The New "Me Party"

Election day is tomorrow, and after glancing at the political ads and listening to the vitriolic rhetoric coming from the campaigns, I began to realize that every one of the candidates is as crooked as a dog's hind leg. Many believe that our leaders are not performing admirably, and more than a few believe it cannot be changed. Actually, it would be easy to change Congress, that perverse little segment of civilized society that has served itself far better than it has served the people of this nation. Their long standing tradition of excessive personal gain thinly disguised as public service is due for a change...
So today I'm announcing the formation of the "Me Party". Our motto; "Here's Your Chance to Stuff Your Pants". Everyone in office now is out at the next election. All of them. No exceptions. And not just on the national level, but at the state, county, city, school district and court system level as well.

Now, a Legislature full of rookies is bound to cause a lot of grief for the thousands of lobbyist's who were counting on political favors after years of slush fund cultivation. Many will predict that with all new people in office, inexperience with the political process will create widespread havoc. I believe that. But the naivete of the newly elected ones would surely bring back common sense to governing, and rather than rid the system of graft and corruption, it would facilitate a more equitable distribution of the graft and corruption.
Just look at all the other benefits this could offer. First, all those people on the dole in public service would have to get back into the mainstream work force with the rest of us, and actually live by the rules they made. Second, if we elect all new people in every election, then pretty soon all of us would be enrolled in the Congressional Retirement Plan. (also known as "The Works") It's a win-win for everybody.

I say we break out those voter petitions, and start signing up your neighbor to be the next whatever. Let's slap some names on the ballot that have never been there before. It would also be quite helpful if they all have a rather sordid past with lots of personal difficulty, frequent public displays of embarrassment, or several failed stints at rehab. There won't be much mud slinging if everybody is dirty. Some drug use would be acceptable, but not required, while being drunk most of the time would get a big thumbs up!
So go ahead and pencil me in for dog catcher. I promise to just drive around all day, feed 'em doggy biscuits and throw a few frisbees, then tell the doggies, "See ya tomorrow". And I also promise to drink more (on the job) if elected. Now there's a promise you can believe in.
I'm Mark Davis, and I approved this ad after drinking.

This week's POTW- some kind of really cool thing I have no idea what it is but it was very heavy and weathered.

Photo credit: Mark Davis
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